Your oldest son and his cousin plan their dream European adventure, and are stoked to get really cheap airfares. Until the day of departure when a text message informs them that their first flight out of Sydney is delayed by eight hours and they will now miss all connecting flights. FFS.
After a desperate call to the travel agent she promises to sort it out and you breathe a sigh of relief that you actually used an agent and are still too nervous to book long haul flights online. Better yet, the agent comes back with a whole new set of flights which have better stopover times and are with better airlines than the original flights. No FFS.
Said son also gets himself a brand new Instagram account to share some holiday snaps. The first pic he uploads is of his travel companion cousin holding your six foot tall son in his arms at the departure gate. Definitely no FFS.
Three entire days spent sitting in front of the computer with phone glued to ear are required to tick off the pages of to-do’s. Not helping is the fact that you have to add two young drivers to both car insurance policies, including one newly minted. Both premiums pretty much double, so you pay the difference just to have them covered, then spend a few hours comparing various insurers, only to find that the others want to charge you even more. FFS.
Reminding yourself that the reason you have so much to do is because you are going away somewhere warm and sunny. No FFS.
Your fifteen year old daughter sorts out her wardrobe and declares she now has NOTHING to wear, as evidenced by the jumbo bin liner now bulging with all of the clothes that used to be in her closet and drawers an hour ago. FFS.
Planning to meet up with your newly married neighbour slash other daughter and her new husband while on holidays. No FFS.
Despite your plans to have every scrap of laundry done before you leave as well as clean sheets on every single bed awaiting your return, rain is forecast for the whole week before you go. Also not helping is that one child who thinks the bathroom floor is his own personal clothes hamper. FFS.
It will be interesting to see how he fends for himself while you’re away. No FFS.
When your new fancy pants freestanding cooker suddenly has one gas burner that refuses to ignite. FFS.
Digging out the purchase receipt for the cooker and seeing that you paid for an added three year warranty. Made even better when you call the store where you bought it and learn that it comes with a two year manufacturer warranty and not the one year you thought. No FFS.
Feeling like a dumbass when the repair man comes out and asks you a whole bunch of uber technical questions, like, where’s the gas tap so I can turn it off? You reply with a blank stare. FFS.
But then he finishes in half an hour and your cooker is good as new again and you haven’t lost a whole day because he made your house his first stop for the day. No FFS.
As soon as the repair man leaves you get off your blog and decide to have a productive day. No FFS.
Til next time,