The week that was…

Sometimes it all just comes at you at the same time, leaving you mentally exhausted and feeling like crap.

Last week we farewelled our ninety year old grandmother. There were so many reasons to celebrate such a long life, and so many blessings to be counted in her final days: that she didn’t suffer for very long, that she had lived a long life, that she went peacefully in her sleep like she had always wanted to, and that we had all had a chance to say our goodbyes and that she knew we were there.

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Proud as punch with the first of thirteen great grandchildren.

But the sadness remains.

She was a huge part of my life, having been my primary caregiver before I started school, and I think that bond was bigger than I ever realised. The fractured family dynamics I get so much shit for blogging about made the whole period before her passing and the funeral itself that much harder, but despite how drained I was from the intensity of it all, the fierce support from extended family meant the world.

The day after the funeral I was just absolutely fucked. I was exhausted in every way, mentally and physically just spent. So naturally the day after that Mr 7 kicked off the fun with a stomach bug mainly consisting of non stop vomiting, headaches, and aches and pains. And that saw out the rest of the week, weekend included.

And reminded me how stupid I am to joke about just needing one good dose of gastro to lose some weight fast.

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Blogging itself hasn’t been so much fun lately. There have been so many posts I have wanted to write but then didn’t, mostly because of the shit that would come later. And while respecting someone’s privacy is one thing, me not being allowed to share my opinion is another thing entirely. I also like the idea of keeping blogging totally non-personal, but I’ve become so used to brain dumping on my blogs that I have come to rely on it as an outlet.

Although I do feel bad for having dropped the ball with Rosie’s Sunday Sessions series. I was really loving it but have to tap out and plead blogging burnout. {But I have still been reading Rosie’s posts, and you all should too}.

I have learnt from past blogging mistakes, and while I won’t delete this one or it’s content I will probably post less. After a year spent cooking for a living I can’t see a lot of action on the food blog for a long while, and this one just isn’t that much fun anymore. Because, you know, I have trouble shutting up and all that.

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So despite sounding all dreary and depressed I’m not. Just coming out of the vacuum you go into during times of death and sickness. Very much looking forward to getting back to normal. The year has speeded up somehow and we’re almost knocking on the door of birthday season, the sun has been out a lot lately, and summer holiday plans are taking shape: lots of good stuff.

Chalk this up to yet another brain dump.

Over and out.

A.

  1. Man, so sorry to hear of your $hit time. Sorry about the passing of your grandmother. I miss my nana every day ๐Ÿ™ And sorry that some people are being so unsupportive. Please keep blogging.

    Reply

    1. Thank you.

      I’ll probably keep blogging, maybe somewhere else though, lol.

      Reply

  2. So sorry to hear about your baba – that shit sucks no matter what age they are/you are. It just doesn’t get easier!
    And you are totally excused for dropping Sunday Sessions – I get it. Some days I think about quitting this blogging caper too, who knows maybe 2017 may be the year to quit?
    Glad to hear you’re feeling better! xoxox

    Reply

    1. I so know I can’t quit though! I’ll just have to find a way to make it fun again. Xxc

      Reply

  3. I recently changed blogs for a lot of reasons, the main one being my ex husband read my other one. It’s a fresh start, but I’m still navigating HOW to have a fresh start with a pseudonym but still let people know who you are without broadcasting it where you didn’t want others to see. It’s complex! I’m sorry for the loss of your grandmother. Mine has just been forced into a nursing home and it’s been hard on everyone ๐Ÿ™

    Reply

    1. Sorry to hear about your grandmother.

      I have moved blogs before but I keep sharing it so some of the same people keep finding me, lol. It’s definitely tricky navigating how much to share and how much to hold back. I don’t even reveal a lot lately but mostly because I’ve been burned by people who think the whole world reads my blog. {I wish!!!}

      Reply

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